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Mars died as his temple burned. No new gods of war exist. (55 comments)
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 16:17 CDT, 10 June 2019 - iMsg
Greetings, good people of ESRealty!

Do we have a crisis of community? When have we not? Some were humourous and epic like Entry 36 and raging Ziff Ifricans protecting their leaders, or Popegate 2005, or POLOS IS RULEZ))), some less so like the exodus of semi-literate cuntards from the QuakeLive forums (Yokoumono, Raythenoob and also that fat cross-eyed Puerto Rican dude fixated on "tierslummers", but I see the Latest Comment section oversaturated with low quality bait threads.It may look like a decline in quality, but low quality bait has always been here, the only difference to now is that Lady Iustitia's scales both were weighted in both "funny shit" and "shit shit", and now the ratio is much different.

Let us have a look at people who have been contributing decent humourous content round here over the past decade or more, I won't go back further than 08, since it was before my time (those few years were wasted on smaller, shittier quake mods that were like tiny redneck villages) so I'll miss out people like way2ez4gtv or Aaron, I have never met them personally so as a newfag am not allowed to unrespect or taint the names of those I do not personally know. Roll call? ROLL CALL


Jonesy? Chased out when someone who was a user admin for 2 weeks and whose only contribution was creating an Admin thread "lol let's ban Jonesy", which caused me to rage-quit ESR.
Madbringer? our moon cycles are not syncrhonised, meaning we come across each other on steam once every 3-4 months on steam, also long gone
Liam, 8bitLoby, Tom and other assorted Lobstarz? the claw is gone and forgotten ==C
becks? Was sacrificed to the oil and gas document controller gods (I escaped)
melechesh? is here, but probably lurking.
funnyB? He got increasingly eccentric with tattoos, is now smurfing on steam but has 5 contacts on there and does not respond at all. I checked out discord briefly last year, PMd him some racial epithets but he either was offline or had PMs disabled.

Please light these surplus Polish candles left over from when the last ever Pope died in 2005 for their peace among the ferry ride on the river Styx with Charon (if completely lost interest in videogames), or for their safe return: [*]

Who is here, who has taken their reigns as someone to create decent, quality content? Is oke, their valid and noble replacement is God of Pederasty Sanchez (how is he still here, I remember banning his second alias on the forums like almost 10 years ago?). And I also recognise zhu from the "latest createst journals". Not worthy substitutes, certainly not for the monoliths of awesomeness listed in the roll call above.

But all is not well! He is a low quality poster with a horrendous sense of humour, his only worthy trait being his persistence. if you've ever been to a small village in the Balkans (any place with less than 100000 inhabitants, examples include Pula in Croatia, Buzau in Romania, Bor in Serbia, Prishtina in Serbia, Pernik in Bulgaria, Slovenia in Slovenia... or you could name any location bar the capital city in Macedonia, Montenegro or Albania), perhaps you have relatives there or you are just a cosmopolitan tourist with a penchant for travel. In the city of the comparable size I mention, every street would have this sort of callous late middle-aged or old man. You know the type, grey hair, grizzled face shaven once every 4-5 days, breath like sour apples due to latent alcoholism, and a whiff of urine in his track pants for the same reason. He spends his days creating arguments with anybody who has the misfortune of coming across his path, for no reason whatsoever. If there is no reason, he shall just guide his righteous anger in any general direction, your dog barks too loud, everyone parked your car in the wrong place (this place is his, who cares that he has no car and has never driven!), people older than him are senile idiots, while the youth is all morally fucked up (every young woman is a whore and a prostitute, every young man is a bandit meathead drug addict), and oh how he longs for the good old days under Tito (Hoxha, Caucescu, delete the non-applicable), and how he'd show them all, oh they would march single file to the nearest Re-Education Camp, Rape Bunker or Gulag, hands behind their back, and show them what's what (with the strength of the entire Secret Bolis behind his wrath!). Why am I bringing up this fictional old man, who despite his personal fictionality is still a very realistic stereotype? Well ecause he is Sanchez' Spirit Animal! You can notice the same thinking process behind every idiotic post...

Let's take a look at his gaming ability and delusions of divinity. He talks game like a proheim, but I don't think he follows it up with action, shaft aim shaking like Parkinson's and railgun lazery that can be beaten by anybody. Jamerio had good railgun lazery, he may not have done great at that LAN, but he is a legit FFA monster, even giving legendary champions like cooller a run for their money (who in fact once briefly retired due to shame of not being to keep up with Jam-Jam, and even twogeedee bows down to Jamerio's prowess as a game producer - RebornDiabotical may be the last bastion of naive optimists not yet worn down by life's cruel trials and tribulations, but it sure as shit won't put any BAFTAs in his trophy cabinet that spans several game genres and disciplines. But I difress: Sanchez is even small minded and pathetic in his choice of targeted nemesis. It's not a criticism of Drejjk, his skill or his achievements, just a statement of the situation: even if Drejjk sees endless threads with his name, decade-old screenshots in tow, he probably just shrugs and thinks "yeah whatever". Trolling only works if the target is affected negatively or is baited into a reply, otherwise it's just water under the bridge, a trickle of sugary diabetic piss in a giant global ocean of the foulest bodily waste and effluvia.

Maybe it's just an attempt to be funny without any knowledge of humour theory or subconscious understanding of what makes things funny, but I have a bolder theory. You see, there's no delusion of divinity and his nickname is just "Of War Sanchez" and he's in fact a she from the famous Girls of Death quake (notable alumni include fox's significant other and the mother to his two children, trito as well as Liefje, Missy and Ms X... other names I do not remember, but for sure there were others! No need to kneel before God (Pantheons, elder gods or even lesser gods. It would explain why a God Of War is not even majestic or divine enough to be a Lesser Demon of Innocent Mischief.

Still, it is only just a theory and could even be wrong, and his/her/xir/their/its gender matters not. What DOES matter is that Sanchez=not awesome, and perhaps uses image editing software and fake in-game bots to make him look more proficient than he is. Perhaps you may ask for proofs. It is oke, for I have anticipated this, and looked through old, old, OLD screenshots, and have found the following:

The year was 2011, the evening was young, the alcohol flowing freely, (at least in the shit-shack I was renting in Albany Park, London at the time), and the game was Challenged PoorMode Arena.

This is exhibit A, and is a cause of ultimate shame, the sort of shit that the narrow-eyed Island Chinamen of Nippon invented Harakiri and Seppuku for. But that's not all! A few years back, memphis (Galician (Iberian, not Pole-Ukrainian Galicia)), a close friend of mine, and one of the many reasons me and a few others ventured into CPM. I sucked (still did, and it has gotten worse due to years of inactivity), but my first non-chaperoned ventures into duelling were against has3 (awesome personality), and even worse, Hal_9000 (awesome personality, both of whom wiped the floor with me, along the tune of 70+ frag deficits. Even more amazingly, they then went on to play each other, and as expected for HAL when playing against experienced opponents, he did not hold back, the soul of Paul Dirac was summoned and has3 lost by 50+ frags as well. I told Memph once back on IRC and his conclusion was as this: "that's the awesome thing about CPMA, there are echelons upon echelons of skill levels, each one capable of doing this much and worse to the echelon below them. And when you get to the very top, this sort of scoreline can happen between 2 equally skilled opponents, based on the alignment of the stars, luck of the spawn locations and spam rockets, and just generic chance.

Keep that all in mind as you view Exhibit B, a game which followed the previous screenshot:

Not only "Sanchez" got blown the fuck out by a 67 frags, but this alleged champion (as the Grant's whiskey and THC merrily took hold of his bloodstream) got beaten by a previously unknown behemoth! That's a 130 frag deficit he'd need to train for, and had there been someone a level above that, such as a snapcase, an eThaD or a Lunokhod, the progression would rise arithmetically!

Clearly discouraged, our hero just broodingly removed her/himself to the empty servers of the already Quake4, for this level of weak bait would not fool anyone in CPM... ggnore infidel better start training Quake 4 instagib skills instead.

There's also zhu but I don't remember much except that he got banned once, and had an aura of self-smug attention whoring. Lithz also got banned for cheating, but he shrugged off, went to master movement in defrag and didn't he play a LAN once in QukeChempions? It was a different game to the one he got banned from, and a different discipline. I am sure spectators mocked him but who cares, he performed at a LAN. Zhu, if you were a bit smarter and more charismatic, that could have been you. Also I just realised while writing, I can't pronounce your nick without giggling, because of this song by Russian Gommies from the Underwater town of St Petersburg. To top the journal off, hereby I present Leningrad ft. GlitchGoat (some annoying pop music chick with no actual singing ability, which doesn't affect this song much):

Ceterum censeo Excessiveminus esse delendam.
Edited by ShadyVoltaire at 16:20 CDT, 10 June 2019 - 12976 Hits
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 13:09 CST, 14 January 2015 - iMsg
* ab is away - gone, if anyone talks in the next 25 minutes as me it's bm
being an asshole -
Edited by ShadyVoltaire at 08:54 CST, 15 January 2015 - 22001 Hits
League of Legends=Stereotypical Bellends (39 comments)
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 18:53 CDT, 28 October 2014 - iMsg
NB: I wanted the title to be "League of Legend Stereotypically Asinine as Usual)" but title limit on characters prevented me, hence the R-bomb.

Hi friends) I just came by briefly as I noticed that some random unlisted Youtube video of mine suddenly spiked by like 6k views. It had been previously embedded here on ESR, but that was months ago and wasn't watched much. Stay a while and listen! For I am about to unveil the developments of the past hour or so.

It was a video from the summer of KaceyTron (appendicies below) from over the summer. Given the current rage and overheating in regards to all that gamergate* shite

* Won't bore you with too much details but here's a paragraph-long summary: Jew Lizards with tits hiding behind the labels of feminism to veil them from being called out on "journalistic ineptitude" having a contest with raged teenage /b/tards high off mountain dew and RapeSection porn about who can be the worst human being on the internet. It's a tie so far!

Anyways, given the circumstances and the degeneracy of both sides of this pseudo-argument, you can see how one might get cautious about an unlisted video gathering 6000 views quite fast and out of nowhere. One would hate to get mixed up with degeneracy of either side's extremeties, especially considering the gamergate outrage is uncalled for, immature and asinine; meanwhile Zoey Quinn makes that guy from Ocean Marketing (google if needed) seem honest and stable, and Anita Sarkessian, despite claiming to be an advocate for change, is not very good at providing objective explanations for the subjects she attempts to cover. Obviously those girls do not deserve the backlash they got (including death threats), but there is so much dishonesty and sensationalism coming from everywhere that it's hard to contextualise the whole thing AND remain objective and still care. But I digress.

Especially considering the whole gamergate side-story was merely a red herring, and you, dear TUPOY(AYA) GANDON(PIZDA) READING THIS have fell right for it! For after unsuccessful google searches and brief twitter/reddit sweeps to find the source of the leak. I was able to finally place the pieces together with the help of YouTube analytics, which notified that the spike hit instantly on the 13th of October. What does this all have to do with League of Retards?

Here's an ESR topic discussing the sale of Mr Florin's Twitch website
Here's a page from a LoL-centric 9gag clone ("LoR-only 9fag clone" sounds like recursive shit by the way. Smelly, Ebola-infected shit from a Down's syndrome sufferer with additional gastro-instestinal disorders).

2 more mouse clicks have established that the copy+paster's main hobbies (apart from out-of-context third-party content recycling/theft) include "playing LoL", having an anti-boner for that chick because inferior League brain cannot grasp the concept of satire and "worshipping the pope" (RIP PAPIEZ [*] YOU ARE MEN!!!). Considering donations have been asked for lesser reasons than DEFENDING THE HONOUR OF ESR (such as "sup guys plx send me accross an ocean for make benefit of glorious nation of QukeLife it will totally worth it for me AND YOU ALL BY PROXY AS WELL"), we start a whip-round to send someone to Poland and for a stat-track M9 Bayonet IRL so we can trace this marcin and CUT OFF HIS XYN (CHUJ). That'll learn him. Yeeep. *spits on floor*

Meanwhile, as a pre-emptive attempt at damage control, I shall change the title of the unlisted youtube video from "HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA TUPAYA PIZDA*))))" (dumb cunt in .RU) to "This video is taken out of context, the chick is being facetious, League of Retards is shit and "marcin" can eat a dick". I really don't want to be mistakenly associated with those gamergate retards. Or those degenerates playing Valve/Riot Cocoroach Simulator: Down Syndrome Edition (DotA 2 being the "Pro edition") to keep watching my randomly recorded stream video I only put on youtube during the summer to show aids and rehepapp.

And that concludes our ad-hoc journey into the MOZG of ShadyVoltaire. Thank you Atlanta, you've been a wonderful audience. GOODNIGHT!
Edited by ShadyVoltaire at 04:35 CDT, 29 October 2014 - 45660 Hits
HI A OR B (14 comments)
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 03:03 CST, 7 February 2014 - iMsg
3128 Hits
Fragmovie1a (26 comments)
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 03:13 CST, 20 January 2014 - iMsg

0 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
Rating: 3.8 (18 votes)
So I was playing with Sony Vegas and Wolfcam yesterday (installed both for the first time), practicing with short clips when I accidentally made a 90 second montage. Featuring draw2d turned on, weirdly chosen esoteric video codecs, incredibad editing, no special effects with the frags themselves being missed rails during tdmpickups, a CPMA non-frag, public lolCA plasma frags and a first minute duel ragequit, so I know this will be popular and critically acclaimed.

Edited by Teen Queen at 05:56 CST, 20 January 2014 - 4767 Hits
Promode Midskill Cup #3 (10 comments)
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 06:51 CDT, 21 July 2013 - iMsg
Hi ladies and gentlemen! I interrupt the current FACE IT sunday news release program to bring you news of a mid-skill CPM cup that forbids higher skilled players to enter, casted exclusively in Russian.

Stream: Russia NoProblemTV
Links: List of Sign Ups, Brackets
Edited by twister_ at 08:45 CDT, 27 July 2013 - 10711 Hits
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 14:21 CDT, 6 July 2013 - iMsg
Starting now, stream to go live in next few moments (keep an eye on the ESR live s treams toolbox)

Further formatting to come later.
Started: 1 hour ago

Notable CPM Signups: Bulgaria Hal9000, Spain Memphis, Finland AHXNXA, United Kingdom ska
Edited by ShadyAK at 19:08 CDT, 6 July 2013 - 1697 Hits
Pope saint now (18 comments)
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 08:15 CDT, 5 July 2013 - iMsg
There is only one Pope, everyone who say otherwise can stfu and stop unrespect.


Edited by ShadyAK at 08:15 CDT, 5 July 2013 - 4125 Hits
Doppleganger by SBS (68 comments)
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 03:04 CDT, 18 June 2013 - iMsg

0 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
Rating: 8.5 (100 votes)
CPM fragmovie of frags by Germany sbs.

The creator, United States of America lolograde has a history of releasing CPM movies, as this is his third after Huge Tits: a N.A. Fragmovie and Chicken Tetrazini.

It also can be noted that England 8bitlobster's Claw & Order 2: Bad Juju can be found an inspiration for this movie.

Please note that if you enjoy the fragmovie, downloading it is a better option, since streams lower the quality by definition (and it was the author's wishes to not upload to Youtube as it would have problems with the soundtrack and blocking). Enjoy!
Edited by tom at 21:14 CDT, 19 June 2013 - 22805 Hits
PoV.Memphis - CPM mini movie (64 comments)
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 14:25 CDT, 16 May 2013 - iMsg

0 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
Rating: 8.9 (106 votes)
CPM player Galicia/SpainSaul "Memphis" Obeillero-Iglesias presents a 2 minute montage/mini movie of CPM frags. It's short and sweet in what United Kingdom Michael "Liam" Williams has described "the best promode based fragmovie that is exactly 1:54-1:55 in length since emir4nt's STRUM."

Song: C2C - The Beat
Edited by ShadyAK at 04:51 CDT, 17 May 2013 - 17238 Hits
Duel Corsair Saturday Derby #2 (109 comments)
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 11:59 CDT, 28 March 2013 - iMsg
Scheduled: 08:30 CDT, 30 March 2013 to 13:00 CDT, 30 March 2013
Schedule: Passed

Dear Ladies and Gentlemen!

After the success of the previous week's installment, in which Belarus Cypher beat Russia Cooller. The second Corsair Quake Live! Duel tournament is scheduled to start on the 30th of March and signups are now open.

We are expecting another great tournament with plenty of high-profile signups, grudge matches, upsets and much more. Additional thanks goes to Ukraine ua.Shadow and to Cyberfight.

Stream: uaShadow
Links: Brackets, Official Announcement (in Russia Russian), Tournament Rules
Notable Players: Russia agent, Netherlands Baksteen, Russia Cooller, Belarus Cypher, Lithuania Guard, Russia k1llmaster, Poland Matrox, Spain p0ni, Russia Pavel, Ukraine uaReaper
Edited by twister_ at 14:33 CDT, 30 March 2013 - 16480 Hits
It's All Over! House Of Quake says... (44 comments)
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 10:27 CST, 22 February 2013 - iMsg
... "It's a Wrap!" to our House of Quake CTF Season 4.

As per usual House of Quake season, we've had clutch play, MVP performances, match scheduling drama, great attempts by certain aspirants and crowning of champions, and much more!

All the outstanding matches have been treated as def-losses for both teams (which gives both teams +0 points and doesn't penalise either clan in regards to their Flags Captured to Flags Lost ratio), unless one of the teams previously withdrew from the league, in which case the remaining team was treated to a defwin as the sole remaining participant.

Thanks for reading, and House Of Quake CTF will be back for a renewed season in a time when there is less clan and national competition, in order to give players with multiple focus to breathe. House of Quake TDM is starting its wrap-up/closure procedures, and House of Quake CA 4v4 and 2v2 have just started.
Edited by ShadyAK at 12:29 CST, 22 February 2013 - 11404 Hits
125 FPS Duel Series (11 comments)
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 07:45 CST, 22 February 2013 - iMsg
View Coverage: 125 FPS
Organiser: Yavich, Nico-QD, Rell, Xron
Location: Online
Date: 1 Jan 2013

Currently, 125fps is proud to host the 125fps Monthly League, a monthly qualification and playoff tournament with a cash purse of approximately 1000$ shared between finalists and qualifier winners.
Edited by ShadyAK at 10:12 CST, 22 February 2013 - 84188 Hits
125 FPS February Duel League - Players (114 comments)
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 12:34 CST, 9 February 2013 - iMsg
Afrter last week qualifier games for the 125 FPS February Duel League, we can confirm the complete list of qualified players (and round 2 invitations), and the groups will be drafted in the near future.

TURBO UPDATE: GROUP 2 IS LIVE NOW (notable participants being Russiacooller,Ukraine reaper, Norway etty, live now @ Zerg's Twitch Channel.

Links: Cup Website, January Player Rankings, Cup Brackets
Edited by ShadyAK at 08:05 CST, 22 February 2013 - 19309 Hits
125 FPS Monthly Duel Leagues - February (29 comments)
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 07:20 CST, 1 February 2013 - iMsg
Dear fans of Quake Live! Starting from next Monday, 125 FPS stops organising the 125 FPS Daily Cup event, launching the brand new 125FPS Monthly League instead. Don't worry about the change of pace - there will be none, and the predicted set of games per month is set to increase. The league will be held on a monthly basis, with an exciting new format to boot!

The qualification stages started, this week every day the registration starts at 16:30 CET and the cup starts at 17:30 CET.

Stream: Ukraine TripleSex
Useful Links: Cup Website, January Player Rankings, mIRC #125fps, Sign Up,
Edited by ShadyAK at 08:09 CST, 22 February 2013 - 12108 Hits
ZOWIE Quake Live Challenge #1 (51 comments)
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 08:50 CST, 6 December 2012 - iMsg
Scheduled: 08:00 CST, 8 December 2012 to 12:00 CST, 8 December 2012
Schedule: Passed

Having been stark supporters of competitive FPS, ZOWIE (in partnership with Excello) are proud to announce a series of weekly duel cups for one of the most renown deathmatch FPS games, Quake Live, starting with Saturday 8th December.

A unique feature of this cup is the fact the ESReality community has been given a chance to vote on a map list from every map used in competitive tournaments over the years, and then to further our requirement for a competitive map-pool, Portugal Ins has carried out a survey of pro-level duelers and given them weighted votes (worth 2/5 votes depending on expertise and stature).

The following is the finalized map list (and you'll find that both the open and the closed, high-skilled duelers/LAN attendees voted in a similar way!)

Note: You will not be able to register in the check-in phase, so please register as soon as you can if you have any intention of playing.

Stream: United Kingdom NoProblemTV
Links: Tournament Page // Facebook Official Excello Facebook Page @Excello mIRC #excello.quake
Edited by roman "Polos" rulezov at 12:33 CST, 8 December 2012 - 11286 Hits
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 13:46 CST, 27 November 2012 - iMsg
Furious Heights: 14% (82)

Aerowalk: 12% (71)

Lost World: 11% (63)

Bloodrun: 9.9% (57)

Silence: 9.5% (55)

Campgrounds: 9.3% (54)

Toxicity: 8.5% (49)

Vertical Vengeance: 7.4% (43)

House of Decay: 6.7% (39)

Hektik: 4.5% (26)

Battleforged: 4.2% (24)

Dismemberment: 2.6% (15)

This Saturday's ZOWIE QL has a unique feature: the esr community has been chosen to select the 5-map maplist with every map that was on a major commercial cup represented.

The poll is set to run until Friday 30th Nov 23:00GMT/00:00 CET
Edited by ShadyAK at 05:31 CDT, 23 March 2013 - 29125 Hits
ZOWIE Quake Live Weekly Series (7 comments)
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 12:13 CST, 21 November 2012 - iMsg
View Coverage: ZOWIE QL
Organiser: Excello
Location: Online
Duration: 1 Dec 2012 to 21 Nov 2012

Excello, in partnership with ZOWIE GEAR is currently sponsoring a weekly duel tournament series for Quake Live on Saturdays, starting with Saturday 1st December (first post-Dreamhack weekend)
Edited by xou at 07:08 CDT, 3 June 2015 - 27779 Hits looking for Active Admins (3 comments)
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 18:13 CST, 20 November 2012 - iMsg
If anyone is not familiar with Excello, they are a fairly oldschool gaming organisation. Think of a a successful 2000s team or player in Quake3/4/Live, SC:BW, FIFA or any other popular eSports title, and rest assured you could be thinking of players winning tournaments under an xlo^ tag.

What many people are unaware of at the moment, is that Excello is also giving back to the roots of the community in the form of a ladder/matchmaking system. Anybody from any game can register on the Execello webiste, and create a tournament with the versatile admin tools.

Not only that, but at the moment, Excello is in a partnership with ZOWIE GEAR to give exciting prizes and increase competition in popular e-sports titles. You might recall this Saturday's ZOWIE Quake Live tournament (which will become a regular series after DreamHack), well this is where you come in: Excello is looking for pro-active and talented individuals for administration purposes.

Useful Links: excello Official Excello Press Release Facebook Official Excello Facebook Page @Excello mIRC
Edited by roman "Polos" rulezov at 18:22 CST, 20 November 2012 - 1740 Hits
CPM FIGHTCLUB #1 (164 comments)
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 08:32 CDT, 30 August 2012 - iMsg
Scheduled: 08:30 CDT, 9 September 2012 to 17:00 CDT, 9 September 2012
Schedule: Passed

The next line of CPM duel cups has just been conceived by Mexico Memphis and Poland ShadyAK! We'd like to invite all interested parties to our new line of tournaments, the CPM FIGHTCLUB series, starting with our duel opener scheduled on the Sunday 9th September 2012. Coverage will be provided by NoProblemTV (basically the rebranded PNS-TV) with exactly the same plan as the last one, with guest appearances by stars of CPM, post-match analysis by the big boys of CPM, and interviews with key players as the tournament progresses! With entik recently announcing a demo roll call for The Contenders 3, this could be a perfect time to create some egd demos and send them in! Sign up now!

Streams: United Kingdom NoProblemTV, Russia 102
Promo Video: Vimeo
Links: Sign Up, How to install CPMA, Q3 PRO Installer, CPMA wiki, Q3A map archive // mIRC #cpmduel
Edited by wn at 16:37 CDT, 9 September 2012 - 38520 Hits
Top 10 list (16 comments)
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 08:45 CDT, 13 August 2012 - iMsg
I compiled a top 10 list of gaming-related phrases or terms I've said out loud in the past month or so, rated by frequency of pronunciation, either in real life or mumble. :

Edited by ShadyAK at 08:46 CDT, 13 August 2012 - 3911 Hits
Where in the hell is Funny "FunnyB" B? (11 comments)
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 07:44 CDT, 4 August 2012 - iMsg
An ode to Kristian "doctor r u 8? )))))) +1" Funny-B (c) ShadyAK

Hair as fair as a maiden's on a sunny day
As a precaution I write NO HOMO to stress the fact I'm not gay
We miss your laughter and your smile
And your Swedish speaking style
To mock someone's accent may be juvenile,
Yet hearing "yump-pad" is versatile
Making noctis rage on Hidden Fortress is a great feat,
So is you and that chick watching those 2 people fuck when the man had bigger tits.
oke men I running out of lines(((

p.s. seriously bro message me cos I need a co-caster for tomorrow's CPM duel cup and you with your stature and feedback and sexy voice (NO HOMO) would be really good. Alternatively I will have no choice but to cast on myself or some shit. I mean somebody like ddk would be great but I don't even know ddk even though he's a great dude and his emerging commentary is really good as well as his youtube channel, however we don't know each other and it takes a special kind of character to agree to cast on a little-known channel that used to be called "PENIS TV" with a dude you don't personally know, and a few people would jump the proverbial gauntlet, and not sure who is capable of saying "yes" to ride this great journey. It's a good thing this stanza is not in the poem cos it would actually make the ode lose it's complexity if the last line is about 17 times longer than the actual poem. I also wanted to utilise some lyrics from Peaches but I don't think that 4 lines of "FUCK THE PAIN AWAY" would contribute greatly to the fluidity of the ode so I left it out :(
Edited by ShadyAK at 08:08 CDT, 4 August 2012 - 2798 Hits
Memorial 1 - Lazery of Chujario (5 comments)
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 21:58 CDT, 6 July 2012 - iMsg
This was a simple one, I took it seriously, actually listed my "achievements" (albeit the screenshot was a random screen of me, which I then made as small as possible when I ran out of text. I was striving for an anti-climatic ending to the story, and I think this was achieved pretty well, and the sarcasm can easily be seen here.
Edited by ShadyAK at 21:58 CDT, 6 July 2012 - 3885 Hits
Memorial 9 - TheAmazing1 (3 comments)
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 21:47 CDT, 6 July 2012 - iMsg
I was speaking to ins about a completely different QuakeLive issue at the time, then I had a great idea about another memorial (the last one) and I actually said "hold on a second dude, register on that site, tell me your nick and I'll give you a screen to post"

He agreed, although he was playing a duel at the time, so I made this quick one in about 10 minutes. At this point, I thought I just would add anything so copy pasted a story about a young lady attempting to achieve diversity in her workplace. Since ins currently resides in Spain, and the IP would show up as Spanish rather than portuguese and he was on that site anonymously ("TheAmazingOne"), I made up a Mexican-sounding name, a bullshit story about oldskool Q2, and a nice picture, and gave it to him.

He actually admitted he wouldn't mind playing in the cup as well, if only he got his q3 to work properly, but I guess it's just water under the bridge. I didn't even plan posting those to esr at the time, so the avatar was just me trying to find a good pic that ins would appreciate.

Edited by ShadyAK at 12:58 CDT, 7 July 2012 - 2268 Hits
Memorial 4 - hard1ovely (No comments)
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 21:42 CDT, 6 July 2012 - iMsg
Another clanmate from clan [13] a.k.a. XIII who wanted to participate and was having problems with format and a sub-story for feelings about Q3. He had a few sentences and I wrote something along the lines, and then writing some more about A$D since I was writing those simultaneously on a cold Tuesday morning.

He wanted to reformat a few things and never really got into finishing it, since today we got banned. Because he wanted to use a screenshot, I have since reused it. (the screen shows a retarded Ukrainian e- team who makes pearls of wisdom such as "what this? you idiot or cheat" etc. and has nothing to do with either hard1ovely or roxor).

This actually is the last "tame" memorial (mild homosexuality, mentioning of matured Dynamo Kiev Footballers, etc).
Edited by ShadyAK at 21:58 CDT, 6 July 2012 - 2136 Hits
Memorial 8 - SP/SPraw (2 comments)
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 21:41 CDT, 6 July 2012 - iMsg
This was one of the last 2 memorials, done today. Sp was like "hey man I want to play in this cup too" and I was like "you have to write a memorial" he's like ":o". Thankfully for him, I already knew what to write. This is one of the memorials that does not have completely original content: I copy+pasted paragraphs from Fear & Loathing in Las Vegas (both the text in the book and the film from this excript is synchronous so whichever one you prefer) and then added some pro-Serbian propaganda that one might see on a video like Tupac Serbia

This is a long-term joke that also incoroporates GTA4, Nikola Tesla and Josip Tito. Oh and SP is a Hunter S Thompson fan, so this pic & first part was kinda spot on
Edited by ShadyAK at 21:58 CDT, 6 July 2012 - 3087 Hits
Memorial 7 - Digit (1 comment)
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 21:34 CDT, 6 July 2012 - iMsg
Digit, a.k.a. Phil, a notorious member of aNk when being in that clan actually meant something has last played a game of quake 3 in 2009 & Quake live in 2010,. But we're pretty tight (no homo) and speak (or at the least, exchange a couple of sentences) on IRC either daily or almost daily. When he saw the memorials, he wanted to participate as well. Since I was already creatively warmed up and writing those for like 2 days I just gave him the forum link and got him to upload the pic I made. At this stage I was just toying with writing whatever the fuck for hilarity.
Edited by ShadyAK at 21:58 CDT, 6 July 2012 - 2081 Hits
Memorial 6 - Triv (No comments)
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 21:31 CDT, 6 July 2012 - iMsg
Triv just basically told me to go to town on mine and he'd like whatever I wrote. I've re-used the same xXx screenshot I used on Zack's memorial since he was present (ironically for the other team, as the arrows point out). At this point I thought "homosexuality, self-indulgence, porn, masturbation... this series needs more cannibalism."

So after a brief google session on German psycho killers, I remembered reading an FHM (or it could have been Nuts Weekly) article about a crazy German dude who met some other gentleman on an internet website, and then, with the victims consent, murdered him and ate his penis. A brief google search for "german penis eating cannibal" found our man! Now I just incorporated that into the story.

This story was initially rejected. I figured oh well, this was fun, but I guess it's over now. Turns out there was a problem with this memorial.

I shit you not, in an article where the writer uses profanity about his achivements and clans, claims that his uncle is a notorious penis-chomping cannibal, the only problem which stopped it being approved is that I, without realising, wrote the name as Oliver Kahn (triv's first name actually is Oliver though).

Well, after a brief search on facebook for an oliver kahn that DOESNT have a picture of the famous German goalkeeper (for a retired footballer, he sure does like to make plenty of facebook accounts), showed and claimed that it was just an unfrotunated consequence and that "Kahn is a popular surname".

APPROVED. At this time, the mumble channel we were on, as well as a few irc channels were in hysterics. I realised that you could write anything and get away with it as long as the first and last sentences mention some shit about Q3.
Edited by ShadyAK at 21:58 CDT, 6 July 2012 - 2185 Hits
Memorial 5 - Roxor (No comments)
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 21:20 CDT, 6 July 2012 - iMsg
This & the rest I have created from scratch using the same template. A brief interview over skype and after I asked for a few brief 1-2 sentences about his Q3 story, he was like "yea I was browsing through old CDs, there were some porn games and there was Q3 so I installed it I guess and played it online".

At the sound of snapping of my fingers, the idea was already basically formed in my head. I wanted to make it sound more complex, and added elements of hedonism, rising from the fact I read a few Bret Easton Ellis, and did not enjoy them. This story basically writes itself
Edited by ShadyAK at 21:58 CDT, 6 July 2012 - 2331 Hits
Memorial 3 - A$D (No comments)
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 21:07 CDT, 6 July 2012 - iMsg
This memorial should actually be blamed for acting as a catalyst for the decadence and depravity you are about to witness in the upcoming few pages. You see, after Zack's memorial was done and approved the night before, with the lyrics of Sir Mix-A-Lot, asd who was with us on Mumble and in a player lobby for dota2 at the time, didnt know what to write. I advised him to put in the infamous forgive English, I am Russia monologue (possibly a soliloquy).

Well, that was rejected and ASD got a 15 minute lecture from the admin à la "WHAT THE FUCK YOU THINK SON? THIS AINT NO MOTHERFUCKING GAME, THIS RLDD IS SRS BUSINESS", after which my disliking for the admin rose. I offered to help and then the story about a poor Estonian boy who just wants to shoot cops, a modern age Avenger, was crafted. Also, I would like to point out that this should actually classify as a form of Flash Fiction
Edited by ShadyAK at 21:58 CDT, 6 July 2012 - 3763 Hits
Memorial 2 - Ziggypoptastic (No comments)
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 21:01 CDT, 6 July 2012 - iMsg
My friend and partner in crime for PNS-tv Zack a.k.a Ziggypoptastic was having trouble with his memorial and having seen the one I posted, requested help in writing it.

This one was done just before a round of MOBA games, and I actually just found a screenshot of myself in a xXx-c4 war (I chose it since it is from a folder of E+ PCWs we did with xXx team in 2008), where the name of the player in question is "shitcunt".

For the actual memorial, you will recognise the lyrics by Sir Mix-A-Lot - Baby got back, skillfully crafted to include "and I played excessiveplus ever since"
Edited by ShadyAK at 21:58 CDT, 6 July 2012 - 2791 Hits
Q3ReLoaDeD Memorials! (11 comments)
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 20:55 CDT, 6 July 2012 - iMsg
Hi wotsup. What you are about to see is the progression of the proverbial competition between the troll-minded and the deluded.

To start this story, I would have to go back one week, and to when a couple of friends told me about an upcoming q3 noghost tournament. "I love instagib" I thought and decided to go on and register & find out what it's all about.

After speaking with the admin about this particular cup and finding out that every player must have a mandatory "Memorial" written in his image, I asked him if that is really necessary. What followed is a 50-message lecture on the importance of those memorials and how they are needed to find out about players, and how it is needed. At that point me and several friends who run PNS-tv were also, on the mediation of some friends who like to see us cast, were in talks to cover some games.

Casting instagib is thankless work, since no-one apart your friends watches those events+once you mentioned the clans, the players, the history and the score, the play-by-play coverage becomes slightly tedious, so you could see we were sceptical at best, but we were surprised at how the talks went, due to the admin having some progressive, but borderline fucked ideas.

And at the same time, I started writing my memorial. I enjoy creative writing, saw that mostly it was a bunch of non-native speakers writing stuff like "helo I Boris I Russia I like NOGHOST I play I win match was much fun win match))) I Moscow)))" and I figured I'd write something light-hearted but funny and nonchalant. That memorial was proven so "popular" that some other friends wanted help with their memorials too. What then follows is a barrage of flash fiction along with minor trolling. The best part was, pretty much all (apart for the last two) of those memorials were approved by the admin (oh yea, you need to have the post approved by an admin before it is shown lol).

Then my team was removed for the official reason of "posting pornography" which is a half-truth at best, and I am pretty sure that the memorials of me and my friends were removed, despite lack of actual pornographic content (I have no confirmation of that, but it is in the mold of the autocratic Nazi-like admin of that place).

Anyways, here are the actual memorials presented in JPEG format as a gallery, in chronological format, with comments about what I was thinking of, and the creative process behind each one))
Edited by Demiurge at 14:58 CDT, 21 July 2012 - 9612 Hits
lol I just... (21 comments)
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 20:51 CDT, 18 May 2012 - iMsg
Got accused of hacking
...on cpma
... clan arena
... public server
... by a redneck who makes Raythenoob seem intelligent
... me

It is indeed a dark day for CPMA
4202 Hits
Let it be a warning to all - bad words! (17 comments)
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 12:23 CST, 26 January 2012 - iMsg
Mist fades in the twilight darkness of an industrial wasteland, synth-electronica of the 1980s beats restlessly as the gloomy future is describe (imagine it the same as "Snake Plissken's Escape from New York or Mad Max 3: Beyond Thunderdome" , the movie intro to what was imagined in the eighties as a post-apocalyptic theme)

The year is 2041, and the World is truely a gruesome place, full of industrial rust, greenhouse gases and radiation which slowly leaked into the oceans due to dumping of waste. The Ecosystem is ravaged, and children can go for years without seeing the sun due to a thick horde of poisonous gas clouds, ripe with acidic rain. This is the preamble to our main story, the buildup to the Portuguese presidential election (which is up since it's 2041 and the people of Portugal still respect their consitution, even though has been changed partially (it is now legal to time travel from Lisbon, Brazilian trans-sexuals are murdered on sight on the territorial Portuguese waters to prevent a strain of super-AIDS to spread into Europe, but the Preseidential elections still happen every 5 years).

The two only candidates are as follows:

- Aníbal Cavaco Silva Prime (incubent president), a clone of a long-forgotten president of a generation long gone who helped the people in the Sugar rebellion of 2015. Even though the President was a leader of a nation, his clone has proven to be ruthless, stupid and representing the interests of mostly the extremely powerful, incurring bone marrow taxes on the poor.

- Bruno Ribeiro Pereira, a late-forties national favourite. A true national hero, the champion of the people promising things to get better. He is a poll-leader by over 40% !!!

The following is a transcript of a televised debate prior to the elections:

ACSP - My bone marrow tax plan was a complex system to increase the national threshold on Human Resources, without increasing the already heavy strain and increasing monetary shortcomings already damaging the lower-to-mid classes.
BRP - This is just one of many Fascist policies I plan to abolish should i become successful.
ACSP - Wait a minute! I just received a nano-videogram. In 2012, the Challenger has appeared in a Quake movie named Gentle Rape under the pseudonym Portugal Insan3. This CHANGES EVERYTHING! He must face the high court of Academica de Coimbra to appeal his death sentence due to the heavy crime of propogating violence of a sexual nature. While the trial is pending, he is to be chemically castrated and sent to Torture Island. This presidential debate is over!
BRP - c]:c

Epilogue: Aníbal Cavaco Silva Prime, as the only challenger won the election and incurred more taxes, such as the blood, feces and stomach acid tax which lowered the average age of a Portuguese citizen to 26. Allegations of vampirism of the higher classes are rampant.

Bruno Perreira is currently awaiting trial. However, he is caught in a proverbial Catch-22 created by the evil clone-government he failed to challenge, since no-one EVER escapes Torture Island so his incoming trial is nothing more than a ruse.

Edited by funny[RX]b at 12:26 CST, 26 January 2012 - 7517 Hits
An objective view into the top16 players (76 comments)
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 03:16 CST, 29 December 2011 - iMsg
It approaches the end of year, so i thought i'd share a view of the top 16 players who just happened to hold my attention in the past 4 months, for the period of September-December 2011, taking into consideration:

- Performance in competitions (both online and LAN)
- Continuous community presence (appearance in random draft tourneys, pick-up games, even publics)
- Memorable moments from the player that other people would recognise as something special in a positive light
- "Man of the match" performances in top div team games/ domination of skilled opponent in a top-level duel match.
- The list includes both QL and Q3 players
- The list ignores weaker points by players. For example. there was a tdmpickup where i got a better fragcount, similar net, and better shaft accuracy than cypher. He was, however out of shape (and I am perpetually out of shape anyway c: ). As an ancient philosophy states, "winners don't get judged".

Anyway, here it is:

1) Cypher
2) Strenx
3) kanin/funnyb
4) ahxnxa
5) Vo0
6) Krysa
7) gooda/gda
8) ins
9) rapha
10) No0D
11) zsx
12) Memphis
13) ZLC
14) frs
15) iP|421
16) Drill
16739 Hits
Pavel: cheat or reality? (109 comments)
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 18:33 CDT, 15 August 2011 - iMsg
Hey guys please find a quick YouTube snippet of one of Pavel's duels:

There have been a few of "shownormals" clips on esr over the years so I understand the scepticism.

And the fact that Pavel could have been setting a trap if he knew that his opponent was in LG ya room. HOWEVER, a pixel perfect rocket on the +walk'ing enemy, at that angle with such impeccable reaction is shifty at best and at worst turboproof.

Pavel could not be reached for comment however if he was, it might go a little like this "Helo)) I Pavel) Who give this here? I pro and who make made video is PIDAR BLYAD)))) Is not wallhack is reaction) I am play wery much like supermen but no laser vision))) only makink skill)))"
20666 Hits
Tierslumming: the seedy underworld of QL (25 comments)
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 07:37 CDT, 13 June 2011 - iMsg

Link prior to approval:
5261 Hits
What the shit Australia (31 comments)
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 18:19 CDT, 20 March 2011 - iMsg

First Diabz, now this shit:

Hi, I'm Paul Eggins, A.K.A. EggHouse A.K.A. 8-Bit Lobster. Iv been taking photos of the Sydney music scene for the last 4 years and loving every bit of it.

6907 Hits
A Jonesy-style hypothetical question c: (12 comments)
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 16:26 CST, 27 January 2011 - iMsg
Would would happen if the French-English hundred years war lasted just 50 years causing spain and holland to rage at each other earlier, thus escalating the entire european history go 50 years fast?

Would Unification of Germany happen in the 1820s, would events of both world wars would escalate half a century before? Would Teddy Roosevelt get shot in Detroit? Would a chasrismatic Jack Kennedy cheat on his wife during his second term as president? Would Malcom Little be the USA's first black president? Would we in 2011 be colonising the solar system and exploring outer space? Or be living in caves hiding against the harsh climate of a nuclear winter?
3697 Hits
Fear & Loathing on the MIDTERM ELECTIONS (109 comments)
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 14:14 CDT, 2 November 2010 - iMsg
Despite it seeming like I was posessed by Jonesy for the duration of this Journal, I was not.

Chapter Xd plz
As the title clearly suggests, this is about the mid-term elections that are happening today in the USA. Some of my co-workers have relatives on the other side of the great body of water that protects us from such great freedoms as The Second Amendment, Affirmative Action, Obesity, Red Lobster Restaurant Chains, Fox News and the G.O.P. (typing this from my flat located in South East London's commuter belt, I am of course talking about the Atlantic) and my boss even spent part of his youth growing up in Brooklyn NYC, all making this a potentially interesting intra-office debate.

It of course wasn't as any debate where no-one seems to hold any strong mindsets. My boss, despite spending part of his time in the US, is of Grenadian descent, while me as a Russian-BritChav dual national one day hope to go to New York to walk around 5th street to shop for sneakers and get wasted in Manhattan and pretend i'm a 23 year old version of Gordon Gekko (or shed a tear in New Jersey outside Princeton thinking "if things were different, i could have gone to OXFORD and spent 6 months here during my master's on an exchange program c:"), but whether the Democrats or the Republicans win, neither one of us is affected in any major way or form.

US Politics were climaxing 2 years ago, when everyone seemed to be cheering CHANGE! CHANGE CHANGE! only to not see any change or progress (yet being oblivious to the fact that should the outcome of the presidential election have been any different, we would have seen a potential change for the worse).

Getting a flashback to 2 years ago, if I recall correctly, this was a contest of a young charismatic presidential hopeful (and a potential first black president) very narrowly defeating the Senator (of arguably the most powerful state in the US (and a potential first woman president) while the <3Bill embers were still burning hot) in the Democratic primaries, then choosing a (also very charismatic and on top of that, a very experienced senator with pretty much his name emboided on the Delaware seat) running mate, to go ahead a 73 year old senile womanizer allegedly unable to use e-mail without assistance, a promise of continuing dubya-style template of policies, and on top of all choosing the ex-prom queen (Xd plz) Governor (Xd plz x2 COMBO) of Alaska (zlq bX) that additionally made a public spectacle of both herself and Mr McCain in the heavily analysed series of debates and media events (Xp dlz), and taking all of this into consideration, the election results were 52.9% to Obama, 45.7% to McCain.

Which brings me to this point: objective US elections aren't very be objective. One could get endorsed by the trio of Joseph Stalin, RIchard Nixon and Ayatollah Khamenei and still get ahead after a quick airbrush TV session, make some bold sounding yet vague statements involving midway opinions on mildly contraversial topics and recover, as Media Appearence is what matters more than experience in (well, any country not just the USA). (at the fear of summoning Richard Nixon from hell by using him twice in one sentence, I will only briefly mention the 1960 presidential debate of smiling and suntanned Jack Kennedy versus a drowsy and sick from flu Dick Nxn (perhaps while the first spent 2 weeks in Hawaii, the second spent it at a boot camp with Satan, learning the valuable skills which made him such a lovely and popular personality) and for those of us too young to remember the outcome of 1960 elections, JFK won C: )

I will attempt to quickly wrap this up by using the final word: MEDIA! even though the 06 and 08 house of commons, senator, etc elections were somewhat damaged by 8 years of DUBBYA-WISION))) and the democratic party STILL had visible problems overcoming some states and in the presidentials, after those 2 years of butthurt republican media comletely disintegrading (somehow unfairly imo c:) both Obama, and the entire democratic party with some nice claims of being a Socialist (THEM COMMIES HAD FREE HEALTHCARE TOO, OBAMA IS EVIL), Radical Muslim (LOL BIRTH CERTIFICATE, ALSO HUSSAIN MIDDLE NAME!! WE TOOK DOWN A HUSSAIN IN 2003 NOW U BRING ANOTHER), ass-slave of oil companies and BP in particular (footage not found due to allegedly Senator Prescott Bush (G.W.'s father, W's gradnfather) being wery rich through a lot of Texan and Middle Eastern Oil (and a touch of Nazi Gold c: )) as well as Obama the Pirate (LOL HIS FATHER IS KENYAN, THAT HAS TO BE SOMEWHAT CLOSE TO SOMALIA, THEY BOTH IN AFRICA AMIRITE) will be somewhat damaging to the Democrats (to put lightly). At least California's Proposition 19 will be a humourous edge.

This will not be as interesting or as touching as the UK elections for me at least, and even in the US, no real opinions and large amounts #care will be shown by everyone apart from the people directly involved (and let's not forget their trustfund kiddies who actually do get to go to Iby League unlike me who just has to go to the park and sit near an Ivy as a substitute (being on the commuter green belt of london, this is fairly easy to do), as this is just another flipside of a long history of any 2-party system in the World, where a lot is exchanged between parties and parties promising a lot to the public during pre-election followed by fluctation of government with no potential changes offered. I will go to work in a blue tie tomorrow. But only cos I feel like it, nothing to do with Democrats or Rednecks and their consequent results in the polls.
15644 Hits
Coming back from IEM5 : New York City (6 comments)
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 13:59 CDT, 11 October 2010 - iMsg
This is to realaborate my thoughts and experiences of IEM5 American Championship Finals . First of all, to recap, I would like to write the following...


2864 Hits
WE MEAT AGAIN 2010 (15 comments)
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 12:39 CDT, 15 July 2010 - iMsg
6629 Hits
LMAO@ South America (25 comments)
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 07:17 CDT, 12 July 2010 - iMsg
Countries in 1/16th: 5
Countries in Final: 0

Also, as shown by the kind, fanatical and raging gentleman gSTRUCTOR and agu_ ,
they are also the new Poles.

5368 Hits
ALSO FOCK U PC (2 comments)
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 07:10 CDT, 12 July 2010 - iMsg

Why i am at work, like 400gigabytes of moozik games and films are being backed up automatically. \o/

I must reinstall windows, which is a good thing. ( :@ ) And i have decided to run a dual partition with Linux for big boys. Please advise if it's a good idea to select Ubuntu as a way to get acquainted with Linux.

1852 Hits
LMAO@us (22 comments)
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 18:34 CDT, 30 June 2010 - iMsg
:c madrid get Jose, Inter get Rafa, Liverpool get raped in ass :@

Brede Hangeland and random serbian dud are JUST the players needed to revitalise Liverpool.

5011 Hits
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 08:52 CDT, 24 May 2010 - iMsg
4449 Hits
Revenge of the Poles/ Raged Like A... (57 comments)
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 11:40 CDT, 19 May 2010 - iMsg
Take £250 Daniel Hechter Paris Collection suit, 2 months old
Take one concrete Pole/Column/Pylon on London train station
Lean against Pole wile waiting for training , win hole in jacket Hechter suit.


Also im supposed to be getting a shiny £50 bonus at end of this month. Not too fucking shabby for a company which thanks to you and another person's efforts went from invoiving £4k per month to £28k per month and growing. BREAK OUT THE CHAMPAGNE, ASDA SAVER RANGE!!!!!!1

p.s. And i don't even have a bafta
p.p.s. But i live paycheck2 advance 1 week before paycheck (the more gypsy way of paycheck2paycheck)
p.p.p.s. I fucked your mom.

10433 Hits
Poetry in Game Context (23 comments)
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 04:25 CDT, 30 March 2010 - iMsg
This is from january. And not even written by me, but so fucking awesome i had to share with the world.

An ode from a clanmember of mine to another clan member of mine who despite awesomeness is inactive and "retired" from games:

Yea, doth thou, verily
beset in thine electric mantle
art hark punishment forcometh
for polish gentlemen, hidden from thy sight
nay hidden from thine rays of doom and death
thy hand be true, thy cause be right

(c) Madbringer jan 2010


Any1 has any examples share please.
3758 Hits
What we learned from G-Data Final (4 comments)
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 20:31 CST, 27 February 2010 - iMsg
IS NOT EXcEPTION IS RULE (image prior to approval)
Edited by ShadyAK at 20:46 CST, 27 February 2010 - 2014 Hits
Hey guys let's make a petition (31 comments)
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 04:15 CST, 19 February 2010 - iMsg
To officially change the word "Friday" in the english language to "Rageday".
5983 Hits
Xd plz (16 comments)
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 04:24 CST, 17 December 2009 - iMsg
[+] Got a new job a week ago, new dynamic environment
[+] After 2 weeks, there will be a 2 week paid Xmas leave
[+] No longer hobo like half of aNk c:
[+] Gonna get paid a part of it before xmas cos special pre-xmas circumstances

[-] Tired and the bags under my eyes are starting to develop "GO-FASTER" stripes cos waking up @ 7-8 and going to bed at a casual 2-3am don't go together 5 days in row :C
[-] My cunt hard-drive for jerks broke down last week so will have to buy new one in weekend. Nein to music, films, games, etc. Thank you for pubs and books, but [-] again cos waking up @7-8.

So, all in all, i'd say it's all gut,

.aNk! clan and I personally wish u all a Wery Christmas and a Happy new year. Except for all the trolls, u fuckers die in ass

5038 Hits
Quake Match Manager Tool (8 comments)
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 13:40 CST, 28 November 2009 - iMsg
Hi guys, a friend of mine made a neat little tool for arranging/storing Quake3/QuakeLive matches. I helped him with a few ideas and beta testing so i'm submitting it to a few quake-related places that he isn't too familiar with.

Here is his explanation of the concept and i hope you find this program as useful as much as me:

The Q3MM is a small tool that helps you to organize and manage all your wars and matches.
You can sort them, filter them and view all kinds of statistics. For more information look at the feature list and please watch the video!
You dont need to install anything, just download the .rar archive and extract the .exe file. Right then its ready to use. Have fun!

Edited by KekS at 13:48 CST, 28 November 2009 - 2955 Hits
ImpreZive joins team aNk (30 comments)
Posted by ShadyVoltaire @ 17:08 CDT, 12 October 2009 - iMsg
Team aNk announced their newest addition: Sweden Leo "ImpreZive" Tuikka (pictured with friend Z4muz during this weekend's night out). Not as high-profile as Jibo in NFI or Z4muz going to XLO, but it's a sign of things to come.

Link: Team aNk - mIRC #aNk`clan
Edited by ShadyAK at 19:06 CDT, 12 October 2009 - 8485 Hits
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